The Circle is just a shape to most of you, but to others it's life. We get deep into the ridiculous premise that is The Circle and just how a movie that could have been so right, goes so dang wrong. Featuring bad accents, police states, and kayaks this movie has it all and we have something to say about all of it. Complete with our own shape themed movies and general disbelief that this movie was made.
Blade. Laser. Blazer. Wesley Snipes doesn't wear a blazer in this movie but he sure does fuck up some vampires. We watched Blade: Trinity in honor of Ryan Reynolds talking his way into Deadpool. Thought it was on the high side of Rotten Tomatoes this movie will always be low to us. Featuring our "guest" Alex (we know, we know), we break down just how Blade: Trinity breaks down 15 minutes into the movie. Though under 2 hours it really feels like 2+ hours you'll never get back. We talk Reynolds, we talk Biel, we talk Snipes, we talk drunk(ish) because that's really the only way to watch this movie. Listen up and listen in!
It's the month of women, and we're starting to think we celebrated it the wrong way, we watched Lara Croft: Tomb Raider. With the help of girlfriend of the pod, Ellen, we dive deep into the (arguably) better version of Indiana Jones. We talk about Angie's career making movie, how it leads to Brad Pitt, Cambodia, and beyond. The episode also features the new and most exciting games ever to be done (probably) on Reel Rotten.
WARNING: In honor of this being the worst movie of the year we produced easily our worst podcast to date. We experienced feedback and buzzing throughout the episode, and though we would love to blame it on our producer Kyle it seems to be just a temporary equipment malfunction. So if you make it through the episode, email us and we'll send you bitcoins. REAL BITCOINS!
Fire emoji, is not the emoji we would use to describe this movie. The "winner" of The Golden Raspberry, The Emoji Movie is perhaps not actually the worst film of last year, but it definitely isn't the best. Nick, Stephen and special/default guest/producer Kyle go in depth on a movie about using pictures to talk. Give it a listen, or not, we don't give a [poop emoji].
Happy Oscars Day to all you cool cats out there. Feline like a not-so-great film to counter-balance the celebration of this year’s best? Nothing is finer than Oscar-winning actress Halle Berry’s most superiorly inferior superhero film, Catwoman! Join Nick, Stephen, and special guest Derrick Lamb as we discuss this unintentional farce.
SHOW NOTES
Derrick’s blurb: A hairball would leave a better taste in my mouth than this Catwoman movie.
Stephen’s blurb: Meow’s not the time, meow’s never the time, for a Halle Berry–Sharon Stone–Benjamin Bratt vehicle.
Nick’s blurb: Cross in your eyes.
Are you already having Olympics withdrawals, well we have the show for you, D2: The Mighty Ducks. Just like T2, D2 is an action romp filled with... action? It features the classic matchup of youth hockey titans Iceland and USA (most of which come from the same Twin Cities area in Minnesota). This episode, Nick and Stephen, with the help of actual hockey player Matt, discuss everything from Trinidad and Tabago having a hockey team, to why the hell they kept Goldberg in despite giving up obscene amounts of goals.
SHOW NOTES
Stephen’s blurb: This movie was just as good, and just as terrible, when when I initially saw this in 1994.
Matt’s blurb: It was like the awkward middle movie that I can’t keep watching enough of.
Nick’s blurb: Quack.
Dear Listener,
We hope you listen to this episode about love and grief and shallow selfish characters only caring about their love and grief. Ah, life! Nick and Stephen and special guest (A WOMAN) Rachael break down the movie meant to break you down. They talk new versions of the movie, Swankiest moments, and a new segment, Rachael's Rant!
Yours,
Reel Rotten
P.S. I love shoes
SHOW NOTES
Stephen’s blurb: If you’re a fan of happy movies, sad movies, movies that give you hope, movies that make you want to change your life—watch The Mighty Ducks 2.
Nick’s blurb: Dear P.S. I Love You, It was okay to see you again. P.P.S. Never again. That’s from Nick.
Rachael’s blurb: P.S. I Love You—relive a lost relationship, and take a walk through Holly’s ugly shoes.
You remember a few month ago when Jackie Chan came back? Yeah, do you remember The Fifth Element? Well, good news, we reviewed Rush Hour 3 for you! Two special guests, Genevieve and Alex, joined Nick in studio for a bonus pod! The first special guest pod of many more to come. Anyway, Rush Hour 3 did not age well. We recorded this at the end of last year, and had this movie come out in 2017 it would not have survived a week. Shoutout to Brett Rat (our new nickname for him). Watch the movie or just listen, we get pretty deep.
SHOW NOTES
Genevieve’s blurb: The cast must’ve stretched daily to be able to film such a massive reach of a trilogy. Rush Hour 3 is the Brett Ratner of the saga—an unwanted and annoying assault. #bonuspointsforpunchingpolanskiintheface
Nick and Stephen have no blurbs of their own for this one, but they like Genevieve’s blurb.
When the Game Stands Tall. What does that even mean? Nobody knows and we're pretty sure that's the point. Regardless we watched a movie about the worst high school in northern California and we talked about it.
SHOW NOTES
Nick’s blurb: They converted on 4th and goal—if goal was a mediocre football movie about a high school I’ll never feel bad for.
Mike’s blurb: You might want to Remember the Titans, but you’ll want to forget When the Game Stands Tall.
Stephen’s blurb: Happy is he who repays you for what you have done to us, he who seizes your infants and dashes them against the rocks (Psalms 137:8–9).
Strange indeed. To celebrate the new year and the new legality of everyone's favorite substance we watched a Strange Wilderness. Bear with us as we navigate this new world we live in. If the movie doesn't bring you in, the guest will, Joe is not only the best looking guest we've had on, he's also the most musically inclined. So listen to our most meandering musical munchie filled show yet!
SHOW NOTES
Stephen’s blurb: This movie was clearly a contractual obligation from Paramount, or an elaborate hoax by Fred Wolf to the American people on what was considered a popular comedic film.
Joe’s blurb: This is the Happy Madison Jonestown, the career suicide of everybody in it.
Nick’s blurb: If Strange Wilderness was a show on TV, it would be the only show on my DVR.